How i feel now

How i does feel been an aris in drugs who doesnt create anyhing and doesnt achieve what most love?
has exactly the way i feel in his moment, is so complicated to even describe, i want cry but i doesn help or make he things be better, doesn give me an answer of all my questions and a solution o all my ficional and real problems.
Wake up girl, i have been on a dream or a trance, is called love, well, mosl been inlove, what is my drug, who doesnt believe me, i tell you that been in love have the same effects that been in drugs, specially with cocain, so that amazing, powerful and dangerous is trully been inlove by somebody.
bu wha i haven ell is how hard is i o deal when our significan oher is a housand of kilomers far away.
eah everhing is perfec when i am busy, or what  i can say about theday we ge o alk or acual have a nice coversaion, videocall at skype is amaing,almost like been with the other person, but without actually been in the same place.
So yeah, i should talk more about the topic, really he is on the highline in my mind.
But i am not talking about how dependent i am or not about him.
I feel free but what does make me feel more down apart of dont talk with him at the moment is actually dont create anything.
I feel stuck on my life like an artist, everytime i am learning something new about life in general, an specific, but i feel like i am only saving information like a computer, so strange feeling is have all those feelings,